Toys

"You are amazing...seriously. I am in awe. Totally obsessed."

My boyfriend repeated these types of outstanding compliments over and over again. Instead of soaking them up, I stood in my kitchen shaking my head.

How did I get myself in this situation? Since when did I become second fiddle to something smaller and plainer than me??

Well, I guess it happened precisely when the new iPhone came out. I instantly became less important.

I have never seen anything like it. My boyfriend sleeps next to it, holds it constantly even if we're hugging and stares at it for so long his eyes water. It was the apple of his eye.

Every time I think I am getting a little bit of QT with him and the conversation is rolling, I will ask him a question and the inevitable follows.

"Wanna find out? I can look it up on my phone."

Ugh. No, I don't want to find out. Want to know what I feel like doing? I feel like throwing that thing out the window as far as I can see and watch it die a slow, screen breaking death.

One day I was so frustrated that my precious alone time was being monopolized by the phone, I huffed out my front door in a fury. Hopeless and indignant, I decided to call my personal adviser - my sister.

She enlightened me. "You have to create boundaries." The phone will not be allowed within five feet of us if we were hugging or talking over dinner. The phone will be turned off when sleeping. And most important, the phone is not the source of all things good and wonderous.

I was familiar with these boundaries. The most important part of being a dog owner is setting limits. Let the dog know who's boss.

When you get a new puppy you are always practicing letting your puppy know when to play, when to eat, when not to bite, where not to sleep and when to sit.

Sometimes they listen. And sometimes they fight you. Sometimes you give in (most of the time). Sometimes you don't (very rarely).

I hoped to prove a more successful track rate with my boyfriend and his love.

I've been practicing asserting myself lately. Occassionally, hiding the phone from him. Telling my dog to get off the couch and allow room for my boyfriend and I to be lazy. I figured I needed to be equal in my boundary setting actions.

But even after all these efforts, the second you're not looking, they're back at their toys. Boys will be boys I guess. Astor is back at his ball I hid and Mark is back on his phone. I am still trying to be the boss, but I always have online shopping as my toy and my boyfriend is letting me getting away with that for now.